Pretty Much, I Have the Best Boyfriend Ever.

I hadn't seen Brad in a few days because I've been working so much, and he's been helping his parents sort out a lot around the house before they leave for Florida this winter. We were supposed to have a movie date last night, but I picked up an extra shift hoping I would be off by 9 except then it got super busy.

I was soo close to having a meltdown in kitchen. The cook was trying to talk me down from like full-on screaming. It was just so incredibly hectic, one of the worst shifts I've worked so far and totally unexpected since it was a Thursday night. I didn't even realize how upset I was until Brad walked in around 9 and I ran to go hug him. I thought I was going to burst into tears right then and there, but having him around made things better. It slowly started to die down, the girl I was working with who was driving me crazy left early, and I had a moment to clean the damn place. It ended up taking me an hour after closing to finish, and the cook had left, so Brad and I had a couple of drinks in the dark bar and just talked for awhile. We're thinking of going to Florida this December, and Mont Tremblant for snowboarding with my family this February!

It was so nice having the place to ourselves, and I thanked him over and over again for being the best boyfriend ever and helping me out with closing. We went back to my house afterwards to "watch a movie", but of course we didn't watch the movie and just fooled around instead. We fell asleep right after and slept until 7 this morning. Now he's gone, and I'm just getting ready for a day of tanning and shopping with my friend. Her birthday was a couple days ago, so I think we're going to go out later to celebrate it!

Hopefully I'll get to see Bradley again after work tomorrow night or Sunday... and maybe if Victoria's Secret is finally open I can buy a surprise for him today!

I Love Booty Calls

Bradley called me yesterday afternoon to make plans for the night. We went out for dinner, smoked a joint and went to see Zombieland. It was funny but then I got scared and I wished he was there to sleep next to. So Brad was helping his parents out at home today and dropped by while he was in town picking something up. He scared the absolute crap out of me at my bedroom door!!! Then we did it from my kitchen back to my room, and he left an hour later :) I'm leaving for work now, same shift tomorrow, maybe another surprise afternoon visit? It was so worth it.

Seriously Sucks

Last night Brad started ranting basically about what is posted below. He doesn't want to grow up or think about the future because it's depressing, and I'm like the polar opposite. He's not sure he's cool about his brother moving out or his friend getting engaged, and I'm totally psyched! He doesn't believe in marriage, and I do. I don't know if it's the priest and paper thing or the commitment thing he has a problem with. Either way, he doesn't think about me in his future, or the future period. It would be different if he lived day by day to the fullest, but I feel like we're both just biding time right now, so it's like he's not living for today or tomorrow.

I don't like that I can't talk about our future together because it "freaks him out". I'm NOT one of those naive girls who thinks "together forever" but when I picture going to school, I picture him at my homecoming and visiting me on weekends. When I picture moving out, I wonder what it would be like to have him as my roommate. When I imagine getting married, as every girl does once in awhile, I definitely don't see a blank face as my fiance. Of course it's Brad, why wouldn't it be? I love him now, so I want him then. It doesn't mean things won't change down the road. People drift apart, make mistakes, fall out of love. All you can do is close your eyes and hope for the best.

It bothers me that he's soo logical and refuses to think that far ahead because who knows what will change... Where's the fun in that? I reeeally don't want to think about all of this. He loves me. We're young. Go with the flow. I think I'm okay with that, but there's that little nagging voice that's like, what happens if in five years we're still together and he still doesn't want to grow up? Then I'm screwed!

Fun Week Of No Work...Now What?

So it has been made official, I quit my job and have had one of the most relaxing weeks in a long while. Since I didn't have anything to really do during the days, I have been going over to Emily's house in the morning and crawling into bed with her while she is still asleep. We will usually sleep until about 1:30pm, wake up and take advantage of the empty house. It is too bad that this lifestyle couldn't be permanent because that would just be awesome, but eventually the money would run out and then what? I just think it is such bullshit that we get to the age of 5 and start school, and at the end of grade 12 it is one of two options: Go to college/university and get a further education to hopefully get a better job, or start working right away. I personally chose the first option, but then after three months realized how much I actually hated school, so I came home and worked. I went through a couple of jobs before I went to work with my buddy at a landscaping company, which is the job that I just quit. So here I am, feeling like I am staring at a blank wall, not sure what to do next. I want to be able to live my own life without some boss telling me what to do or having to worry about money. I want to be living in a nice house with nice things, able to travel anywhere and anytime I wanted. Guess what you need to do that? Money. Guess what you need to do to get money? Work. Seems unfair to me that we don't get to live our own lives until we retire at an age when we don't have the same energy we used to. Unless you win the lottery or have some setup ready for you that most people would never get, we are stuck in this rat race along with everyone else. I guess some people are happy with their jobs, but that is a small percentage. I am one of those people who would be happiest making lots of money while not working, and I don't think too many people in the world would disagree. So now, my plans for the future, I am going to get my real-estate license and work my ass off for the next little while. My parents have done well for themselves in this business and they are pretty much retired at a fairly young age. Thing is, they didn't start as young as I am about to, so I am hoping to make the money I want and be able to retire in time to live my own life.
Alright, enough ranting for tonight. I'm going to crawl into bed with Em whose sleeping over tonight and already asleep.