Seriously Sucks

Last night Brad started ranting basically about what is posted below. He doesn't want to grow up or think about the future because it's depressing, and I'm like the polar opposite. He's not sure he's cool about his brother moving out or his friend getting engaged, and I'm totally psyched! He doesn't believe in marriage, and I do. I don't know if it's the priest and paper thing or the commitment thing he has a problem with. Either way, he doesn't think about me in his future, or the future period. It would be different if he lived day by day to the fullest, but I feel like we're both just biding time right now, so it's like he's not living for today or tomorrow.

I don't like that I can't talk about our future together because it "freaks him out". I'm NOT one of those naive girls who thinks "together forever" but when I picture going to school, I picture him at my homecoming and visiting me on weekends. When I picture moving out, I wonder what it would be like to have him as my roommate. When I imagine getting married, as every girl does once in awhile, I definitely don't see a blank face as my fiance. Of course it's Brad, why wouldn't it be? I love him now, so I want him then. It doesn't mean things won't change down the road. People drift apart, make mistakes, fall out of love. All you can do is close your eyes and hope for the best.

It bothers me that he's soo logical and refuses to think that far ahead because who knows what will change... Where's the fun in that? I reeeally don't want to think about all of this. He loves me. We're young. Go with the flow. I think I'm okay with that, but there's that little nagging voice that's like, what happens if in five years we're still together and he still doesn't want to grow up? Then I'm screwed!